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So I wanted to write up a few thoughts that have been on my mind. My understanding of the world includes the view that every human has a spirit animal and every animal has a spirit human. You can accept this from a simple logical standpoint if you think of humans and animals as concepts rather than just physical entities. Humans anthropomorphized animals because animals exhibit traits that exist in humans, at least roughly. Some animals rely on deception and camouflage, hiding and stalking. These animals might be comparable to human traits of cleverness or being a trickster. Some animals are large and vast, strong and unsubtle; the comparisons here are obvious. Thus the way a human acts and looks has a conceptual counterpart in the form of a spirit animal.

In regards to an animal, their "spirit human" is simply how they act when stripped of all claws, teeth, strong jaws and little whiskers. Are they pleasant? Are they ugly? Are they intelligent? Are they cruel? These are all exhibited by the spirit human's form and behavior.

Essentially the upshot is whether you're an animal or a human, you have something which represents your strengths and weaknesses, your spirit. Your spirit is affected by your body, and vice versa. Thus your spirit does and will change, depending on your actions and that which you have experienced in your life. There are many directions in which these changes can go, but there are two main ones: up or down. Down leads towards the diminishment of your spirit, while up leads to the fulfilling of your spirit. You can go up for as long as you want; indeed, forever. But you can only go so far down, depending on where you started in the first place, before your soul will detach from your body and you die.

Changes happen in millions, billions of different ways, and some of those will be up while others are down. As long as the total sum of those going up is greater than those going down, your life will continue. Once it passes that mark however, you begin to age, descending slowly to death.

The funny thing is we can direct those changes, at least to some extent. There are plenty of things we can't change... but we have plenty of control over one thing if we want to, ourselves. By steering yourself in one direction or another, you can reach certain goals that mean the changes you experience in your life are generally leading you up rather than down. Sometimes it's difficult to do this, and sometimes you don't need to; but if you see yourself continually in bad circumstances, it's worth a try to take control over your life and decide where you want to go. After deciding where, you have to figure out how.

I've found, for myself, that a good way of starting out is considering where you came from. I am part Chinese, part Serbo-Croatian-Czech, the latter people originating from an often troubled part of Eastern Europe. For those that don't know, Serbia and Croatia came from the former country of Yugoslavia. Serbians and Croatians rarely get along, so it is quite funny that my mother is the result of the two. Her Croatian father (also part Czech) was an orphan who managed to create a modest production plant in Michigan, doing a lot of work during World War II and the aftermath. My Serbian grandmother came from a little farm. My father came from wartime China to the United States at a young age. My grandfather, a part of the Nationalist movement, stayed in Taiwan. Only my grandmother and their children came over. An interesting tapestry to say the least.

Having watched my mother and father interact over the years, as well as perhaps just a bit of whimsy, I imagine that my father is probably a snake. His year is that of the Ox, but that's not how I determine spirit animals. My mother, who is quite a woman, I believe to be a Siberian tigress. As I say, whether I am correct or simply dabbling in some fanciful dreaming, I do not know, but I am sure I am a synthesis between the East and the West. That much is true. I have had experiences where I've seen an Eastern dragon, and where I've seen myself as an Asian dragon. I am too thin and spindly to be a normal Western dragon, that much is obvious! But I can legitimately lay claim to Western ancestry. I am part Serbian and part Croatian-Czech. Thus I am not solely an Eastern dragon. But much of me comes from the East, from China, and that is how I spell out my heritage.

I am a Chinese-Serbo-Croatian-Czech Dragon. I know where I came from, and now I can decide where to go from there.

Continuing on from finding your roots. Finding yourself is another important goal. In many ways, finding yourself is actually defining yourself. It is important to be honest with yourself; acknowledge plainly the good and the bad that you have done. However, that is not the whole story. Where will you go from here? Let's say acknowledging the good and the bad is accepting it as yours. That is only the starting point (and in itself, a long process! Neverending, in fact...), as now you can decide to progress or regress. Regressive action is amplifying the bad acts you have previously done, or committing new ones. Progressive action is amplifying the good acts, which is always doing something that benefits another, along with or even instead of yourself.

Oh, did I fool you? Did you think there were only two options? Things aren't so black and white.

There's also a neutral option; although true neutrality may be impossible to achieve, one can approach it. Because good and bad are often relative, or at least used relatively by most people; "those people are bad" never takes into account "those people"'s experiences and environment. Indeed, "good" and "bad" are usually used by one group to label another group as an antagonist, initiate conflict with said group with the intent to diminish it, and if possible eliminate or subordinate it.

All of existence can be broken down into several categories; matter and energy are some of the terms science utilizes. Chinese Daoism uses its own categories in tripartate configurations. There are three levels, with three further steps to each primary level. The first level is composed of people, events and things. The second level is composed of heaven, earth, and humanity. The third level is time, space, and the universe.

There is a further dualistic concept central to Daoist philosophy; the yin-yang.

My belief is that Daoist doctrine is fundamentally based on the assumption of a binary nature to the universe. My own personal experience leads me to believe that the nature of reality is mathematical, and that reality can be explained within the terms of ones and zeros. The trick to understanding this comes from Daoist philosophy. Let us take the yin-yang, and align it with 0 being yin, and 1 being yang.

yin                 yang
0                    1
black             white
dark               light
cool               warm
night              day
moon             sun
earth              heaven

even              odd

The principle is escalating pairs of co-existing opposites. The observer does not exist without the observed... but what happens when the observed is also an observer?

Infinite recursivity of steadily larger and more complex ideas is my view of reality's nature. Each idea required a pre-existing idea to come into existence itself; let us say that dark required black before it could exist, and night required dark before it could exist. Black to zero; all these are yin.

One could make some arguments about the order of the above list, but let us imagine it in the correct order of ascending complexity. Eventually, we get to the level of concepts required to construct our reality.

I would like to explore this further in another post, but for now would like to come back to the three levels. Note that Heaven and Earth are listed as Yang and Yin; I believe the other two levels also correspond in a similar manner, with Time being Yang and Space being Yin. The first level I am not certain about the order; my postulation is that People would most likely be Yang while Things would be Yin. The logic in this lies in the other two levels; Heaven and Earth are separate entities connected by Humanity. Time and Space are separate concepts which combined form the Universe. People and Things are separate forms which when juxtaposed create Events. That is my interpretation.

It should be noted that Christianity seems to have a similar foundation, at least the Catholic church; with the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. What would be the third in the Mother, Daughter trinity?

While yin and yang are the elemental building blocks of reality, there is something required to connect them which produces change. These are the third element in each of the three levels; Events, Humanity, and the Universe.

Thus two is required for existence, while three is required for creation; one, the other, and the product, all in mutual co-existence.

Coming back to defining yourself. In the my previous essay on roots, I said I am a Serbo-Croatian-Czech-Chinese Dragon, son of a Siberian Tigress and Snake. How can I use this knowledge to define myself?

There are nine levels in total; People, Events and Things, Heaven, Earth and Humanity, Time, Space and the Universe. Two out of three of each level are a yin-yang pair, while the third is the fusion between them. One can practice this exercise as a method of defining yourself.

You have a yin part and a yang part, with yourself being the combination between the two of them. Languages can be paired off in yin-yang combinations as well; for most North Americans, English is the fusion language, particularly in the United States. Take your yin part and yang part; in my case, tiger and snake. Name your yin part in each of your yin and yang languages, as well as your fusion language; in my case, Serbo-Croatian, Chinese and English. Name your yang part in each of your languages. Finally, name yourself in each of your languages. For me, I am the Dragon.

Now, you know each of your nine levels. For me,
Je sam Tigar             Je sam Zmija           Je sam Zmaj
Wo shi Hu               Wo shi Shé              Wo shi Lóng
I am Tiger                I am Snake               I am the Dragon

That is all well and good, you might say, for a hybrid animal like a dragon. What about if I'm a dog or cat? I'm not certain how to answer that; you should have at least three levels to practice, so long as you have two non-English speaking origins. A German-Irish mix, who I know several of, would have one name in German, one in Gaelic, and one in English. Thus, do this exercise with one level:

Ta Me Faolchú
Ich bin Wolf
I am Wolf

 Beyond that, I don't know. Perhaps you can concentrate on adjectives or occupations, such as happy or artist or writer. Specific types of your animal species can be helpful; with wolves, famous positions include alpha, omega, and lone. A second level may be:

                              Ta Me Aonarach Faolchú
                              Ich bin Einzelgänger
                              I am a lone Wolf

The goal is to arrive at nine definitions of yourself. Why nine? Well, because it's a lucky number in China, of course!

No, I kid. The tenth is your full name in all of your root languages. The nine preceding definitions are the nine stages of fractions from .1 to .9. Your full name is 1.0. The theory is existence proceeds through ever repeating cycles, as the world traverses time-wise the metaphorical "trip" from 0, the beginning, to 1. At that point, there lies two polar options, with one potential neutral option. The world can reset itself, essentially going backwards from 1 to 0. The world can progress, from 1 to 2. Or it could technically lock itself into infinite repeating cycles gradually approaching the number 1. As the world goes through these cycles, the idea is that you can, by defining yourself in the three level levels manner, fulfill all the steps necessary to reach 1; traversing the worlds of People, Events and Things, Heaven, Earth and Humanity, and finally Time, Space and the Universe.

By reaching an understanding of this recursive cycle and its nature, one can transcend it; it is as simple as understanding that 1 + 1 = 2, 1 - 1 = 0. (Although according to a Hawai'ian kapuna ((elder, and my brother's god uncle) I spoke to, 1 + 1 apparently equals 3! Can you understand why?) There can be no progression if one is constantly undermining one's self. Understanding the additive and subtractive processes of life is necessary in order for one to be able to cope with the pains and travails of Earth, the rules of Heaven, and the nature of Humanity.

By giving myself, or accepting, that these nine words represent a part of myself, I create ground upon which to build. Animals have their own subtleties in each culture, and so in that sense a Tigar is not quite the same as a Tiger, even though they represent the same physical entity. They each have cultural baggage that creates aesthetic differences in the mental concept. They become repositories of your thoughts and emotions, particularly those deemed negative. It's a way of taking your negative qualities and accepting them into yourself, by creating an aspect of yourself that can acceptably negotiate those intense emotions.

For example, I am usually fairly pleasant. I can link that to my Lóng personality, since the Chinese Dragon is a celestial, heavenly creature. I'm not always so serene, though! Sometimes I can barely tolerate all the idiots in the world. That is when I am Zmaj. The Serbo-Croatian dragon, one of two varieties, according to that most eminent of sources, wikipedia, is "considered as extremely intelligent, wise and knowledgeable creature of superhuman strength and proficiency in magic, very rich (usually described as having castles of enormous riches hidden in distant lands) and often lustful for women, with whom it is capable of making offspring. It often breathes fire and is generally accepted as a highly respected being, and while not always being benevolent, never as an entirely evil creature. Legends were spread about many historical and mythical heroes that they were conceived by a dragon."

Well, I'm flattered already! The point is that Lóng is my Yang, Heavenly orientation, while Zmaj is my Yin, Earthly orientation. Dragon is the catchall that binds it all together; Humanity. In Western religious perspective, the world is usually divided into two halves, but these are heaven and hell. Understanding the difference between this western perspective, of heaven versus hell, and the eastern perspective, of heaven and earth, is key to understanding the truth behind Daoist methodology.

Therefore, now one has a place for all that is deemed "negative", but is in fact a necessary component to life. It is when we let these qualities consume us and those around us that harm is done. By creating a place, a creative place, where one can continually adapt to the slings and arrows of daily life, one becomes more capable of dealing with one's dark side. Acceptance of this self is key, because it is only then that one can transcend the cycle of heaven and hell.